Strengthening Self-Esteem and Self-Concept

You are more than what the mirror shows.

It’s become unbearable – the name-calling, the insults, the negative self-talk, and all of it coming from you.

You’ve wondered why you are still standing. You feel like shit.

It is easier to play it off when you’re around others, yet your mind won’t stop bringing you down when alone.

You’ve heard others criticize you, sometimes for the ‘good’ you thought you did, other times for the ‘bad’ you didn’t mean. You are not happy with yourself, your actions, your image. You feel you can’t pretend anymore.

Although you want a better life, that concept feels so estranged when you don’t even want to deal with yourself. You often ask, “What’s the point?” You wonder if you’ll ever be as happy as all your contacts on social media.

Social media posts, reels, and stories can be sooooo misleading.

You’ve taken a selfie before, so you know it usually takes a couple of them before finding the ‘right’ one to post.

Just like you, others experience the same process. The beauty of posting is that it allows you to ‘choose’ what you’ll post. It gives you the ‘control’ as to what to post. It’s rare to hear others share how difficult or how long it took to ‘look’ a certain way, sound a certain way, or have what they are boasting about.

Yes, that ‘other’ person looks happy, yet you cannot know how many ‘smile’ poses they offered before selecting THAT picture.

Some individuals share perfection in a skill that took hours of practice. Make-up tutorials, for instance, took years of practice before perfecting their skill. I’ve met individuals who share pictures of their ‘happy family’ vacations or moments when they struggle through money challenges, infidelity, miscarriage, or abuse.

Yet so many of us compare ourselves to what or who we see on social media.

I get it.

I’ve been there.

We’re only human.

We all have good, bad, blah, and WTF days.

How you define yourself impacts how you see yourself. Body dysmorphia, for instance, results from ‘seeing’ yourself within a ‘distorted’ view due to how you feel and think about yourself.

Bad days happen when unexpected situations arise, and you tell yourself you ‘can’t’ figure it out.

Your expectations are key, yet if expectations of yourself are outdated or too far in the future, your present becomes ‘blah.’ These days compounded and become your new way of describing yourself.

However, you are not what the day or night offers.

You are not a skill or expectation.

You are so much more.

Here’s one thing I’m willing to bet on…

You want more than what you tell yourself you deserve.

Ana* has become so self-conscious that she would rather stay home than go out in ‘public’ with her friends. She doesn’t like how she looks, her style, or even how she talks. She tells herself she sounds “stupid” or “has nothing interesting to say.” Yet, she dreams of meeting a partner that will “get her,” but her fears get in her way.

Pablo* is so frustrated about residing with his parents. He has wanted to move out for years, yet he feels guilty for leaving his parents without his emotional or financial assistance. His lack of privacy limits his dating game as he gets upset at himself “for not being able just to have my space and do what I want.” He has chosen to stop dating so that he doesn’t have to explain why he lives with his parents. He states, “They’ll think I’m a loser when I tell them I don’t have my own place.”

Ana and Pablo were able to individually explore how their frustrations represented underlying, outdated, personal rules in sessions. They learned to integrate other aspects of themselves that offered different interests and strengths for them to empower themselves from.

Let me help…

Limiting beliefs and personal rules aim to keep your old behavior patterns.

Acknowledging which patterns need updating and which will be replaced is where you’ll understand the version of yourself you consciously choose to honor.

You’ve been through some sh*t, but there’s more to explore.

Shit will happen, yet you’ll learn to use it as fertilizer. In sessions, through mindful exercises (Ex. meditation, visualization, writing, dancing, age regressions), you will listen to and see yourself differently.

I want you to see yourself differently.

Together, I’ll guide you as you explore yourself through the lens of mind, body, and emotional integration. We will practice heart-coherence breath practices to allow you to reclaim the way you soothe when those thoughts target you. You will rewrite your story from different perspectives, choosing activities to integrate your preferences.

You can redefine your values, needs, wants, and goals.

You can redefine anything that is no longer for you. We’ll explore the old vs. preferred value system to determine activities that support the congruency between your behavior, thoughts, and heart. Through conversation and exploration of inconsistent choices, you’ll be able to confidently honor your behavior choices.

Are you ready to create a new chapter?

I know you are because you know you can offer yourself change. Yes, it’ll be a process, but it doesn’t have to be a long one.

Let me show you how the grass is already greener inside you.

Let me guide you into seeing yourself ‘wholistically.’

Call me for a free 20-minute call: (786) 571-6617. No strings attached, just well wishes.

*The names and stories above are composite narratives and have been changed for client confidentiality.